The Best Day of Your Life - How to Enjoy Your Wedding
Author: Adele Kirkby Clark
The year, months, weeks, days leading up to a wedding can be extremely stressful for everyone involved. Often we get too caught up in the pressure of all the preparation that we tend to forget what the day is really about. We stress ourselves out over the colour of the ribbons not perfectly matching the colour of the roses.
Whilst all of this is important on your special day, you should not allow it to completely overtake your thoughts. This of course, is easier said than done, in the weeks leading up to my wedding I went to sleep worrying about the things that could possibly go wrong at the wedding, because I was thinking about this before sleeping these thoughts continued into my dreams where they became even further dramatized and I would then be awoken with horrifying thoughts and jump out of bed to continue with the endless planning. This resulted in me thinking about the wedding 24 hours a day, not only does this eat at your spirit it also leaves you physically exhausted.
The week leading up to the big day I had not had more than four hours sleep a night and this was showing on my face in some pretty dominant black circles under my eyes, the wedding rush also led to myself and my close family missing meals for days. This came back to bite us on the day when one of the groomsmen, my brother, fainted in the middle of the ceremony. The congregation all gasped and looked straight at me with that oh, poor girl. I could have cried on the spot and asked to start again, instead I saw my brother was fine and I started laughing. Hearing the bride laughed lightened up the whole ceremony and instead of becoming an embarrasing moment not to be spoken about, it became a joke for the rest of the night.
The perpetual rush also took its toll on my mother who was running around frantically the night before the wedding and in her hurry fell and broke her leg in four places. Because the wedding was still priority she ignored her pain and continued to walk on the leg for the weekend, in high heels! This has now left her bed stricken for 6 months! But she said something the week after that I will never forget, she said breaking her leg was the best thing that could have happened to her. Why I asked.. She replied that the weeks leading up to the wedding she was a mess panicking about everything, then with the broken leg it took her focus off all the small things, like worrying if the napkins were straight or if the flowers were going to hold up. She said she focused all her energy on being able to walk and it made her forget about all the other small things, which she also said made her enjoy the wedding so much. It also taught her how to delegate rather than trying to do everything herself, initially she did not trust anyone else to set the tables or pick up the cake or flowers, but when she could not do it herself she realised that other people where capable of doing the same tasks.
All in all the day was an amazing success and far beyond my wildest dreams, because in the end I decided to simply enjoy myself and not worry about anything else. A happy bride made everyone else instantly happy. The weather leading up to the wedding had been terrible and my brothers were rushing out the morning before to buy plastic to put all over the grounds in order to keep my dress clean, you could see everyone flinching as I walked hoping the mud was going to avoid my dress. The tension was excruiating, so i flung off my shoes, hitched my dress up and continued on my way… Yes, I am aware it was hardly classy and not the way I imagined to be walking in a wedding dress, however after everyone else seeing me being so relaxed about the mud, they were also instantly relaxed. I could have spent the whole day worrying about getting dirty and I am glad that early on I decided that I just wanted to enjoy myself and if there was a bit of mud on my feet well so be it.
The wedding photos were also a point of concern for everyone involved, including the photographer, as he later explained he had worked with some stressed out brides that destroy the day for themselves and get terrible photos because they are afraid of the drizzle messing up their hair. We had a ball having our photos taken, we went up to the top of a mountain and discovered the gate to the field was locked the photographer was dissapointed yet more so shocked when I said ok I will jump it. Because I was willing to jump that one small fence we got the most amazing photos and also had the photographer take thousands more photos than he was paid for as he was delighted to work with a bride that was not a complete nightmare.
So, whilst many brides might be reading this thinking that they will not allow their wedding day to be like that and that it shall all be perfect. Well sometimes the conditions are not going to be perfect, sometimes it rains, people faint, people are late.. But it is all about what you make of it..
Here is my advice on how to make your day the best day of your life…
1. Do not stress about the small things, try and organise everything in advance, but remember no one will notice if the ribbons are not perfectly matching the flowers! They are too busy looking at how beautiful the bride is!
2. Seating Plans– Making seating plans can become a nightmare, especially if you have a split family or have family feuds. But do not forget it is your day, they are coming to celebrate your marriage, your guests are there because they love you, they are not children and they will put their differences aside in order to make your day wonderful.
3. Weather– The weather is the one thing we can not control, but rain is not the end of the world, think on the positive side, you may be lucky like me and get amazing photos with rainbows in the background.
4. One thing that is really important make sure the bride feels like a princess, choose the perfect dress, get your hair make up and nails done. If you feel like you are on top of the world nothing else matters.
5. Do not forget what your wedding is really about, that is sharing your love with your groom and your guests. Have a great time and enjoy their company!